27 May 09 PM

Today I have counted toilets, caught an overheated bus and broken my shoe. I need a beer. So despite my back crying out for someone to press their whole weight against it - in more ways than one - I have walked out of my way to get cheap beer from Tesco. The girl at the till seems surprised that I don't carry ID, despite it being legal for me to drink in this country for over a decade.
- No ID at all?
- No, my driving licence is on paper, in a filing cabinet in Gloucestershire. And it doesn't have a photo. And I've had my bag nicked enough times in London to not carry my passport.
- Well I'm afraid I can't serve you.
- But I'm 28!
- Well I'll tell you now you don't look a day over 20.
- That's kind of a moot point, isn't it? Given that you only need to be 18 to drink in this country?
- If you look under 25 you need to be able to show proof of age.
- But I don't look under 25. I'm a fully qualified architect, though, and I've got the business cards to prove it...
- You could have got those printed yourself.
- They're double sided, full colour, satin finish. Do you know how much that costs? Probably more than a fake driving licence, that's for sure.
- Well I'm afraid we can't accept that anyway. Those could be anyone's.
- Even if they're the same name as the one on the card I'm paying with?
- Yes.
- So you're accusing me of card fraud as well as trying to obtain alcohol under the legal drinking age...?

*huff*

Now I'm tired, red faced, frustrated and sober. And my back still hurts.